Death Panel invititation – please RVSP

shoutabyss:

Courtesy of the random number generator. It’s an oldie but a goodie and still made me laugh. I’m such a rogue. My graphic design skills were really something back then, too. Seriously, though, how many friends have you lost to the death panels? That must have been hard on you. I’m sorry.

Originally posted on Shouts from the Abyss:

You are cordially invited:

Death panel invitation

What, exactly, does it mean to go “rogue?” I checked the Merriam-Webster dictionary and found this:

rogue:

  1. vagrant, tramp
  2. a dishonest or worthless person : scoundrel
  3. a mischievous person : scamp
  4. a horse inclined to shirk or misbehave
  5. an individual exhibiting a chance and usually inferior biological variation

And this is how Palin describes herself? I could not agree more.

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Beware the internet. Or maybe not. Just be yourself & don’t, whatever you do, blub

shoutabyss:

Something random I found and I liked it very much so it’s my reblog of the week. How much should we care and feel about what other people have to say? It’s worth pondering about.

Originally posted on lillai23:

I made a rookie mistake. I did what I’m always telling other’s not to do, especially my teenagers & other young people, so prone to getting their feelings hurt – I let a strangers words on social media get to me.
I’m 39. I should know better. The reason it got to me so much was that I had, on some level, thought the people involved had a mutual liking of me. If I tell this story to my real life friends they’d be laughing at me, saying “Vix, what ARE you on about you silly cow? Some random online? That you’ve never met & are never going to meet & even if you ever did you’d probably not look at them twice anyway. Stop being such a dick”

Yeah. I’m a fool. But I’ve also written about the power of words & how we can really connect with people…

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Breeder Outrage

Artistic rendering of "stabby."

Artistic rendering of “stabby.”

Note: Hippie Cahier proactively assisted with a single instance of grammar in this post. The remainder of errors are, as always, solely my own. -Ed.

A teacher quipped on Twitter one day that her students made her feel “stabby.” Outraged parents, obviously, well-provisioned with torches and pitchforks, demanded that her head be removed and braised like an oxtail and served on a silver platter as a delicate amuse-bouche at the next school board meeting. Now that is justice deliciously served!

Yeah, that sounds like an appropriately-measured response. Because, yeah, I’m so sure they’re all such wonderful people and perfect parents to boot.

Fact: On average, Americans shop six hours a week and spend only 40 minutes playing with their children.

Source: PBS.org – Affluenza

In the world of social media umbrage, judgement can be swift and final. Make an ill-advised joke before boarding an airplane and by the time you land your employer may have already knee-jerk terminated your career. That must have been a really good joke. (I’m not attempting to evaluate the social content of the joke here.)

Sometimes the target of ire may really “deserve” what they get. I guess in some cases the downside of not waiting for actual facts can backfire. Oops. Too bad, so sad. At least you got your 15 minutes of notoriety, right?

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Comic: You Can Bank On It

multinational-bank

When Life Gives Bullets

lead-balloons

Microtears Of A Clown #wink

BESTPIX Toilet Themed Exhibition Attracts Visitors

Why? I don’t know. This image spoke to me.

So the other day I was reading this article about poop and thongs (it’s my way) when a line of text reached out and grabbed me:

Wipe thoroughly but gently. Too much friction may cause microtears, which are more prone to infection if fecal matter gets inside them.

Source: Jezebel.com – Why Is There Poop on My Thong? An Investigation

If you’re anything like me (and you’re probably not) your first reaction might be, “Hey, motherfucker! That’s some goddamned useful information.”

My lot in life is to be behind the times and bring up the rear.

Now I understand as well as the next person that in our fear-based taboo-driven culture we’re supposed to figure out most valuable life knowledge via “self-exploration.” But where do we draw the line? Perchance maybe this nugget of wisdom should have risen to the level of being lore that might have been passed on?

Young people have to rely on adults to share the true mysteries of life. We simply aren’t born with the ability to glean it all on our own.

Where adults fail, education is supposed to finish the job. Yet, somehow, none of my classes ever got around to a topic like this. Not health class. Not home economics. Not wood shop. Not even my favorite class, Septics 201.

Now, in my twilight hours, I’m forced to rely on a snarky internet post to finally explain the facts of life when, really, it’s information that should have been brought to my attention yesterday. Only now, at the end, do I finally understand.

I can’t help but wonder what else I don’t know.

Guru Comic: #Poop Society

guru-society

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