Assholes abound

An aerial view of the property. The two trucks in the top-left belong to the property owner and are illegally parked.

You’re in for a rare treat today. Here are some pictures of the place where I work. I’ll bet you are excited now. Whoa now! Easy does it! Don’t get too excited.

We start with the aerial view of the property and a little background information.

The property is located within the city. The owner is a local developer. He wanted to build a structure that would serve as his headquarters (office space and storage) and also provide two other units that he could lease to businesses. Like the one that employs me.

And, because he wants it all, he wanted his very own parking lot, too, even though the lot size and shape made that problematic.

As you can see, the parking lot is a very tight fit. Employees are prohibited from parking in the lot because it is very hard for customers to navigate in such a confined space. But the owner wanted what we wanted so he found a way to make the lot fit – parking convenience for users be damned.

In the left picture you can see another view of the parking situation. The final parking space is marked as handicapped, no doubt because some local, state or federal regulation forced him to provide such a thing despite his whining and tears.

In the right picture you see how he responded. He simply parks in such a way that he blocks the handicapped space from being used. After all, he does want to hassle with parking his big trucks in marked spaces and having to navigate in a parking lot that is too small.

That wouldn’t do at all!

When you are the property owner, you get to make your own rules. You know what rules are, right? Those things that apply to other people. When you don’t like the rules, be creative! Do things like inventing your own invisible parking spaces.

This concludes this reading from the Book of Assholes. Remember, they abound.

8 responses

  1. You know what probably bugs him the most? That he can’t forge a handicapped parking pass because everyone would recognize his vehicle. I bet that it just burns his ass.

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    1. I’ve seen people misuse those, too. Like my last boss. His wife hurt her knee so he enjoyed temporary handicapped privileges for six months. Asshole.

      At least he got a ticket for no seat belt. And then whined like a stuck pig about it. Once again, “Rules don’t apply to me!”

      Shut up. Dial 9-1-1 for the whambulance. Whaaaaaa!

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  2. Oh yeah, that is hard core self centered ass hole behavior. Do banks look for that sort of thing in deciding on a business loan?

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    1. I think banks appreciate a well-centered asshole. Oh, wait. Did I get that wrong? 🙂

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  3. I don’t care how nice he can be otherwise. If I haven’t before, I’m now judging him to be a Xtian (not to be confused with Christians, who follow the Rabbi’s teachings). That’s some fucked up shite.

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    1. Not only is he devout, he considers himself a paragon of virtue. I’m pretty sure he thinks he’s getting his own planet, too.

      I learned recently that, according to some, there is some latitude when it comes to interpreting the 10 commandments. For example, the commandment against lying can actually be broken down into at least three different types of lies, and not all of them are counted. Who knew?

      I guess if you are motivated enough you can justify almost anything while still convincing yourself how good you are.

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  4. I’m surprised your boss doesn’t just buy a handicap sticker from some poor bastard and then take up the spot.

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    1. Me, too. I’ve seen a lot of nefariousness when it comes to handicapped spaces. I don’t know how some people live with themselves. Hopefully living with themselves will be their fate once they end up in Hell. I’d call that poetic.

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Bringeth forth thy pith and vinegar

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