Rivering the stone cold nuts

This one time something nice happened to me. Snort! But it was only play money so it didn’t count. And, apparently, I used to play poker. Remember when that was a thing? We had cable and I watched all kind of poker shows like The World Poker Tour, the World Series of Poker on ESPN, and Celebrity Poker Showdown and many more. I haven’t seen any of those shows in years. I’m too busy with important stuff like Minecraft. Anyway, like I was saying, one time the poker gods smiled on me. It was so exhilarating I responded by plunking down some real cash on one of those cheating games floating offshore on tropical islands and lost it all. Good times.

Shouts from the Abyss

This is the tale of a Texas Holdem “miracle card” on the river.

I had playing conservatively and pushing hard on solid hands. When I was called I generally took the pot with a strong hand, and if I lost a showdown it was generally because I had the best hand at the turn and was beaten by the river. So the players at this table could generally assume I was a pretty tight player who only moved in when I had the goods.

Unfortunately this screen shot doesn’t show the action that led up to this point. I had limped in and called weak bets all the way to the river. Both of my opponents were weakly playing the two-pair they had flopped. I called a weak bet at the turn hoping to see another diamond, thus getting a nut flush draw. That wasn’t mean to be.

Again they…

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Bringeth forth thy pith and vinegar

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