- Live by the fake, die by the fake. 3 minutes ago
- 1. Wife leaves. 2. Sit on toilet. 3. Doorbell! Wife needs back in the house! 😡 5 minutes ago
- Found bag of already opened cookies in the house. Interesting! 6 minutes ago
- RT @co_rapunzel4: This is actually more true than funny. dailykos.com/story/2017/10/… 13 minutes ago
- If Twitter increased my limit to 280 I could get a few more ha-has in there. 24 minutes ago
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